I guess it's time for rapid fire… here comes 3 countries worth of blog posts and then some! I guess I'll start way back when…
After Ghana and before South Africa, I was CRAZY busy. We started our competitions for the sea Olympics with a pageant! It was the King and Queen of the Seas competition. Honestly, I've always wanted to do one of these and I always admire my other sisters when they do them and I finally had the stage! It had three separate parts: a kid friendly joke, a talent, and an ABC costume contest. I loved the joke portion. Until I was one of the last ones and had most of them taken. Here's a list of my amusing jokes:
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Britney Spears.
Britney Spears who?
Knock knock.
Who's there….?
OOPS! I did it again!
How do you get a Pikachu onto a bus?
You poke-em-on! (Pokemon!)
Why don't you ever take a shower with a pokemon?
Because you're afraid he might peek-at-chu! (Pikachu!)
What is a _____'s favorite song?
Dun dun dun DUN!
A long joke where I have to draw a picture
another joke
Well, people had took my jokes and I got upset. I could only do two of them and I needed a lovely assistant so I chose one of the elder blond children, and they're honestly a great family. I like them so much! But any way…. The jokes were pretty good. I got laughs from the audience. Therefore I was happy.
So… obviously, I don't take myself all too seriously so I didn't do any of the talents that I wonderfully possess (quoting entire movies line by line, playing piano, yelling, speed reading, dancing, singing, running, cooking, sleeping, being sassy) and reworded a rap song to perform. My fellow queens did the Mathlete Rap from Mean Girls, one whipped her hair back and forth, one did a Man-di-cure (her name is A too!), and some of the kings did a ribbon dance, one played the piano, one recited poetry from the great Kanye West, and my pardner swing danced. The respective winners did improv jokes and the queen did a dance to "It's raining men!" and had shirtless guys run down the aisles.
(Me and my homegirl DJTurnDizz Mathlete rappin)
But my rap was great. I used Garageband and edited out EVERY curse word from the beginning of I'm on a Boat (that should have been my talent…) you couldn't hear a thing! And put some different verses of The Fresh Prince theme song together. Somehow, my music got messed up and I had to rap a capella. Glad I had practiced it with the music 26 times on iTunes in one night. So I dropped it, I kicked butt, I only messed up once at the end because I had to remember the dance move at the end. But for your reading entertainment:
To I'm on a Boat:
Oh ship! Get your green sheets ready, we're about to make port! everybody in the place hit the deck but stay on your toes, Med Sea runnin' this let's go!
To The Fresh Prince:
Now this is a story all about how my life got flip turned upside down
and I'd like to take a minute just sit right there, I'll tell you how I became the Queen of the MV Explorer
In Nassau, Bahamas we left port
With a ship full of kids, the craziest sort
Chillin out, tannin', relaxin all cool
And all spendin our days outside by the pool
With pasta and potatoes, the food is no good
Showerin with 2 as shellback should
The ship started to rock and we all got scared
And we were countin' down the days til the ship would be there
We pulled up to a dock about 7 or 8
and I yelled to the captain "Yo homes smell ya lata!"
Walk through the port, I was finally there
Sit on my throne as the Queen Extraordinaire
Well, I guess I'm pretty good. But I liked it. For the ABC portion, I was under the impression that we were a green ship and I shouldn't waste ship resources and that it was a costume contest, not an outfit. Because we were in Africa, I thought that I would go back to my roots and be a Disney character. I wrapped myself in my blanket, threw on some ears, painted m face with lines on my forehead, and walked down the aisle to "the Circle of Life". Yes, I dressed up as Simba. I don't think anyone really appreciated it. Some people used like 500 sheets of paper and garbage bags, I was the only one not to use that or a flag. Whatever. We then had a question and answer session where I was asked what my ideal port was. I didn't think that I could just say "Capetown" or "Beijing" so I described it and I don't think they liked my answer. Whatever, I didn't place. But it was fun and I didn't get to donate as many points as I wanted to for my sea but I met a lot of awesome people who I'm still good friends with (SUP JDAWG!) So it was great! Then CAPETOWN HAPPENED! :) yayayayayay stay tuned!
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